There is a serious problem in this world.
People peeing on toilet seats.
For some reason, there is a majority of the world with serious aiming issues. I can't tell you how many times I have entered in a panic into a public (or even sometimes private) bathroom, and BOOM- there are droplets of human relief chillin on the porcelain.
I guess this whole rant sparked the other day when I went with my lovely friend Alex to Home Depot. Why we were there is still a mystery, but none the less, we traversed the pine filled isles until we found the lavatories. First we tried to go to the unisex bathroom, because I need moral support when I urinate. However, as I looked down upon the toilet seat and saw a sight that made me cringe. Stained yellow and shiny, the toilet seat had been a target for some urinarily challenged shopper.
Ok- so thats what you get from going unisex, I get that. So I ran to the ladies room to try my luck there. Now first of all, I was one of two women at Home Depot, so I figured that the restroom couldn't have been too bad. But I was wrong, very very wrong.
All but one of the stalls had been attacked by the whiz-ard. Some of them had gone above and beyond, having pieces of toilet paper glued by piss to the toilet seat. The entire scene made me queeze, but I thought about it.
Who in their right minds has that much difficulty taking a leak!! Is it a time issue? Are these seat pee-ers in such a rush that they can't even squat square enough to line up the flow? And if there is an unfortunate mishap, why don't you just quickly clean it up? I think this goes beyond me just being disgusted, I think it could possibly be a serious issue. And perhaps even further, this is a commentary on the laziness of the average consumer. You have all the time in the world to look at lighting fixtures, but not enough time to clean up after yourself? It's disgusting I say, pure ickiness.
In other news, they shot the satellite out of the sky, Kosovo declared independence from Serbia, and Castro stepped down from power in Cuba....but who cares about that shit when people are pissing all over the place!!!!!
Peace,
Annie G.
1 comment:
This brings me back to the days of Xanga, Great Franklin Exiles, and Evil Cream Puffs. Such sweet, sweet ranting.
On a related note, as a dude who has like an entire 4 feet to reach down to lift up a toilet seat, it's just easier to shoot right for the middle and let the little droplets of sterile asparagus juice fall where they may. Plus, as a guy, the toilet seat should already be up, regardless of what anyone was doing before.
Such are the words of a "healthcare professional".
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